KristenLunceford.com

Doing it Scared

I find it no coincidence that almost three years ago today, I wrote a post for our adoption blog that began with precisely the same six words I wanted to open today’s post with…

“The truth is…this ain’t easy.”

This week three years ago, we found ourselves a few days away from hearing whether or not an Ethiopian judge would grant us legal guardianship of Selah and, “I honestly could not sleep under the weight of it all.” 

I remember not being able to breathe very well that week. We were so blessed, so hopeful, so close to the mountaintop, and yet so spent from the climb. We were grinding it out. We were breathless. And you can bet we were scared.

My only air supply was Romans 5:2, which I must have repeated to myself a hundred times a day for a week.

“Because of our faith, Christ has brought us into this place of highest privilege where we now stand, and we confidently and joyfully look forward to sharing God’s glory.”

** 

It’s three years later, and we’re gasping for air again. We are so blessed, so hopeful, so close to another mountaintop, and yet so spent from the climb. In less than two weeks, Advance Church will finally have its grand opening, and we are grinding it out again…scared and breathless. The fatigue is real. The fear is familiar. The uncertainty is maddening. I don’t bring it up to complain, but instead to look you in the eyes and say from experience:

 “Obedience isn’t a lack of fear. It’s just doing it scared.”

Jen Hatmaker, 7

It doesn’t matter whether you are planting a church or trying to be consistent in attending one; waiting for a baby or cleaning up after one; preparing for marriage or working to save one; overcoming an addiction or helping a friend through one; putting down roots or digging them up…

Obedience isn’t a lack of fear. It’s doing what God says, scared.

May we be people who advance confidently and joyfully toward the places God is calling us, breathlessly obeying our way through our fear...

 “The goal of life isn’t to make it to a point where we can breathe easy. It’s to get to heaven breathless. Tired because we’ve been faithfully and passionately following God – through valleys and mountains…It’s always hard, but our reward in the future makes it worth it. We’ll rest then. And we’ll push on now.”

~Steven Furtick

 

Our Family Rules

How. Great. Is. This?

I came across it on Etsy last week and ordered it immediately from Alexander Creative. When it arrived on my doorstep yesterday, I dropped everything and went out to get a frame. The kids shared in my joy (Rule 3, baby!), and Evan has already said at least four times that the easiest rule to keep is "never stay angry." If you know him, that sounds about right, huh?

Ryan Alexander offers lots ways to customize this poster (and several others, too), so be sure to check out the goods in his Etsy shop!

Love That...Paper Solution

I'm pretty sure the only thing I dislike more than Paper is voicemail...and maybe clowns. Yes, definitely clowns. Oh, and ice cream trucks. Gah. Anyway, I avoid Paper whenever possible. I can’t stand the piles he makes. I gave up scrapbooking when Mac boogied into my life and wooed me away from him. I have myself on every don’t-you-dare-send-me-junk-mail list that exists out of spite for him. I resent my printer for being such an ugly dust collector and belittle it for being so mechanical and archaic. I roll my eyes every time I have to make photocopies for my kids' teachers (why is this not a one-to-one laptop school?). And, judging by the sorry state of my handwriting these days, I clearly can't be bothered to actually write on him. So Paper and me? Yeah, we don’t really hang out anymore.

Except for…ahem…on Tuesdays.

For all my digital snobbery (and I’ve got it in spades, folks), I have this one weakness—this one lasting soft spot—for Paper. I don’t know what it is, but I have never played well with his much younger friend, Mr. Digital Calendar. Mr. Digi has failed me too many times, mostly because I can’t stand looking at him. I realize this isn’t his fault, but I need someone to blame for me forgetting that I was supposed to help out in Landon’s class last month or that our coffee supply needed restocking last week, so I blame him. 

Which brings me back to Paper. Every Tuesday I sit down with my two favorite printables and marvel at how happy they make me. The first is my Week at a Glance friend, Mr. Awesomesauce. Everyone say, “Hello, Mr. Awesomesauce.”

I love him. He’s been so good to me. Click here to make him yours.

Next up: Mr. Eat Sheet. He listens intently while I choose recipes. He escorts Selah and me to the grocery store. He whispers sweet nothings into my ear so that I don’t forget anything important. He serves his purpose well and takes no offense when he hits the recycling bin as soon as the groceries are unloaded. He’s wonderful, and he's available here. 

All joking aside, I have noticed a real change in my attitude since I started using these two printables at the beginning of January. I don't dread meal planning quite as much, and our very full schedule seems less overwhelming each week because I can easily see everything in one place whenever I'm in the kitchen (which, um, seems like all day sometimes). Sure, I still use iCal which is synced up to Ryan's Google calendar, but only to copy stuff down from it onto Mr. Awesomesauce. I know it's a little old school in the era of iThis and Siri that, but iDon'tcare. This paper solution to my calendar woes has improved my attitude toward certain aspects of homemaking, and...

“If there is anything I have learned in the course of my fast and furious mothering journey, it is that there is only one thing in my entire life that must be organized. The kids can be running like a bunch of hooligans through a house that appears to be at the bottom of a toaster, and yet, if organization and order can still be found in my attitude, we are all doing well. But if my attitude falters, even in the midst of external order, so does everything else.”

~Rachel Jankovic

Unspeakably Thankful.

9:05 AM

" Almost every task a mother performs in the course of a normal day could be considered a transformation. Disorder to order, dirty clothes to clean, unhappy children to peaceful, empty fridge to full. Every day we fight against disorder, filth, starvation, and lawlessness, and some days we might almost succeed. And then, while we sleep, everything unravels and we start again in the morning — transforming."

~Rachel Jankovic

Poison & Wine: The Single Life

We continued in our Poison and Wine series at Advance Church last weekend with my husband giving what I believe was his most transparent and helpful sermon EVER. The topic was singleness and I joined him up front afterward to answer some questions from our community. If you missed it, you can get the podcast here or watch the video below.

 

Ryan posted a robust list of follow-up resources on Advance's blog that you'll want to check out. To his list, I would add these: 

X3watch 

If I could go back in time, I would've asked Ryan to put this free accountability software on his computer as soon as we were engaged. It should be on every dating, courting, and married couple's computers, phones, iPads, etc. regardless of whether or not porn has been an issue for either person in the relationship. 

It works like this: Whenever you access a website that contains inappropriate or pornographic material, the program will record the website, time, and date the site was visited. Then, the person of your choice (an accountability partner) will receive an email or text message containing all inappropriate sites you have visited. 

It's fantastic and gave me a lot of peace of mind as Ryan worked to regain my trust early on in our marriage. I can't believe I forgot to mention it during the Q&A! 

Best Deals for Singles

“Marriage and singleness both present us with unique trials and unique opportunities for our sanctification” explains John Piper. “There will be unique rewards for each, and which is greater will not depend on whether you were married or single, but on how you responded to each.” 

This PDF from the women of GirlTalk is loaded with  practical, Biblical advice on how to seize the opportunities the season of singleness offers. 

Church Planting and the Single Woman

"Church planters need single women who are so committed to serving the church that they are known as sisters and helpers who invest the gifts and talents they’ve received for the benefit of the gospel."

A timely word of encouragement single women helping us start Advance Church!

Stewarding Singleness

A perspective of singleness from a 40-year old member of Mars Hill Church in Seattle.  

When You Don't Have a Better Half

In this in-depth article, Carolyn McCully (via The Council on Biblical Manhood & Womanhood) explains how single women can cultivate femininity in non-romantic relationships, while encouraging the men around us in their application of masculinity.

Let me Be a Woman by Elisabeth Elliot

A solid collection of  essays on what it means to be a Christian woman, whether single, married, or widowed.  A must, must read for any woman seeking to more fully understand, embrace, and walk securely in God's calling for her. 

Dating non-Christians

A straight-to-the-point response from Joshua Harris to the question, "Is my relationship with this non-Christian guy ok?"

Questions to Ask When Preparing for Marriage

For the bullet-list lover, John Piper offers up more than fifty key questions (and organizes them by category...oh my!) you should be asking yourself and boyfriend/girlfriend/fiance during your courtship. 

12:35 PM

Never Grow Up

Your little hand's wrapped around my finger
And it's so quiet in the world tonight
Your little eyelids flutter cause you're dreaming
So I tuck you in, turn on your favorite night light

To you everything's funny, you got nothing to regret
I'd give all I have, honey
If you could stay like that

Oh darling, don't you ever grow up
Don't you ever grow up, just stay this little
Oh darling, don't you ever grow up
Don't you ever grow up, it could stay this simple

I won't let nobody hurt you, won't let no one break your heart
And no one will desert you
Just try to never grow up...

~Taylor Swift